Greenland, Greenland, Greenland
First published 5/22/1997

Greenland. Don't get me started on Greenland.

OK, look. First of all, who knows anything about Greenland? No one. Yet it's only twenty-six miles away from Canada at its closest point. How did some country we don't even know get so close to us? By sneaking up on us, that's how!

They don't like us, those Greenlanders, or Greenlandians, or Greenlünds... whatever they call themselves. It pisses them off that we know so little about their geography. Most Canadians couldn't even find Angmagssalik on a map. That drives them crazy!

You want to bug someone from Greenland...

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